An essay at Mother.ly

Before Hadley was born I wrote an essay about the end of pregnancy. I submitted it online and then kind of forgot about it to be honest. Well a couple weeks ago I got a message that  Mother.ly had accepted it and decided to publish it. I was so excited!!!

Then this week I got notice that it had officially gone live on their site. I wanted to share it with y’all. Thank you for reading here and I hope you enjoy it there.

“It will only be so much longer that my son runs over to me to kiss and hug my belly, unknowingly kissing and hugging his little sibling from the outside world….People will stop genuinely asking how I am feeling….Seats will not be miraculously opened anymore for the woman with a huge belly…It will not be forever that my husband whispers his love to an unseen child, telling them about the world they will soon enter.”

Read the full essay here, “There’s no way to speed up this pregnancy, so perhaps I should slow down.

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xo, bethany rose

the L family | frick park

In our group of people here in western PA, there is another couple with the names, Jake and Bethany. We have fun with it and call each other “the other Jake and Bethany.”

Well when they found out they were expecting a baby boy this year the wait was on to see if their baby would have a name beginning with the letter “E” just to confuse everyone more (our son is named Emmett). Instead they chose Isaac and the name couldn’t fit him any better!

They are such a sweet family and having them as my first family to shoot this fall helped put my nerves at ease. Isaac was so happy and smiled for pictures for nearly an hour and we had perfect weather!

 

xo, bethany rose

Hadley Rose: month four

Hadley, Hadley, Hadley! You keep us on our toes and we love you for it.

 

I am writing this as though the last couple days (since Hadley officially turned 4 months) have not happened (because they have thrown us for a loop….waking up every two hours at the beginning of the week to sleeping last night TEN/ELEVEN hours).

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Month four has been the month where I finally feel like we are starting to get into a routine. Hadley naps more consistently lending itself to me having more 1 on 1 time with Emmett and having more time to clean and work from my computer.

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Hadley LOVES talking, laughing, looking at you and being held. A little extrovert!? She can also be a little holy terror when she is tired and you are not helping her fall asleep. For this girl to sleep, she basically just wants a blanket over her face. She will fall asleep in your arms, the swing or a bassinet/crib as long as a little lovey is covering her face. She still fights sleep at times though. She is  also still being swaddled or in the Merlin Sleep suit. Any tips on getting a baby who LOVES to be swaddled transitioned out of that? She still has not rolled over (though I find her on her side, so I know it is bound to happen soon).

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Some Hadley Stats

weight: 12 lbs 4 oz according to our home scale (her 4 months check up isn’t for another week)

height: *to be added*

diapers: size 2

clothing: She is in a mix of 0-3 and 3-6. She is seriously our little peanut after Emmett!

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What Hadley is up to:

-found her feet It is so cute to see her pull them up and play with them.

-more alert Every month she becomes more alert and people are constantly commenting on it.

-talking,talking,talking! I literally just copied and pasted this from last month because she is just noisy! 😀

-smiling and laughing Again, same as last month. Her laugh though is getting deeper and more of a belly laugh. It is so freakin’ adorable!

-wants attention Still copying and pasting here. She can be crying and then you look at her and she stops. Literally, she just wants you looking at her or to be held. This is not to say she doesn’t self entertain as well.

-loves her play gym. It’s so cute: the second you put her under there either her legs start going because she is so excited to be under it or she starts crying because she knows you are leaving her!

-sleeping 9 hour stretches This is about the same.

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Hadley Photo dump:

 

xo, bethany rose

My [raw] Motherhood Essays #2

edited to add: I’ve received such wonderful feedback on this already and I am so appreciative of that. I did want to reiterate though that I realize this “resting period” is a season. With our son we had him in China at 6 months of age and did a lot with him. This time is just different–and that’s okay with us. It’s still early 🙂 

It was a summer with one item on the bucket list and it wasn’t a traditional item either. A summer where I learned to just say, “Oh well.” A summer where whatever happened happened and I learned to say, “Next year.” As I planned for this summer I even kept my hopes and lists down and yet I still felt the sting of disappointment. Disappointment that was soon turned into a smile exchanged between my husband and me because we knew….we knew it was just a season.

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When I found out I was due with our second baby at the beginning of the summer (bucket list: check!) , I shrugged it off and said, “No plans. No commitments. We’ll just stay home all summer and adjust to life with two. ” And while that is what we did for a large portion of it, I soon realized my whatever attitude might not be enough to glide through.  I came up with a tiny list of things I’d like to do over the summer. I made it small and simple:

1. Blueberry pick.

2.Work on my photography.

3.Go hiking.

4. Roadtrip to our friends’ house 4 hours away.

5. A day at the beach

Instead this is what happened: We arrived to pick blueberries on a somewhat rainy day just as the baby needed to eat. My husband and son started picking without us and by the time I was done, the rain was in full swing. They returned to the car with a small bag of berries and I never left the car.

Work on photography? If you count pictures of my new baby, that’s about it.

Oh, we went on a hike. It actually went really great. But the amount of time it took to figure out food for a gluten intolerant child with limited options, picking a place to hike that was over an hour away and a baby that was still eating every two hours…well let’s just say we did it only once.

And as for our road trip to see our friends, I got the phone call en route that my grandfather had passed away. That road trip turned into two back to back trips and sleeping in five different  places that week.  I did, however, get my beach day in.

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If there was one thing that could make me slow down, it was the birth of my daughter. My daughter has showed me that I cannot do everything. Nay, I should not do everything. Even more, four months later I still find myself quitting things and saying no to things as I just try to survive and navigate “mom of two” life. I find it ironic that my daughter’s name in Hebrew means “resting” or “rest of God.” I feel like that is literally being thrust upon me and I have no choice but to “give up.”

It can be a negative or positive thing depending on your outlook. I never wanted to be someone who stopped doing things because I had children. Go ahead. Laugh. Judge me. While I admit it part way has to do with pride, it also has to do with the belief that I think too many people really put their kids in front of themselves too much and stop doing things. Please. Let me explain.

I want to give my children the world. I want to be selfless and teach, love and show them what it means to be a kind human and love Jesus with all their hearts. My prayer every day is that my children will be in Heaven with me eternally. I will do anything in my power to be a catalyst in that relationship.

So when I talk about people putting their children in front of them I mean this: we are parents but we are also wives, friends, daughters and workers/volunteers/etc. here on earth. We need to take care of ourselves. We need to still find our identity in Jesus and pursue passions and talents of ours. As parents though, I realize we might not be able to pursue it 100% as we did before. But we can still pursue it to some degree. I believe finding that balance lies in conversation with God and your husband and possibly a mentor if you have one.

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Ok, that was a long tangent. I digress.

 I am learning to rest. I am learning to say, “not this season” or “just because we can’t do that now, doesn’t meant we never will.” I may or may not have started that mentality with some kicking and screaming. But I am at peace now. I am at peace that I made it to the beach once this summer. I am at peace that we ate outside for one meal. I am at peace that a new summer wardrobe was not bought. I am at peace that we didn’t even make it to the zoo.

I’m learning to focus on specific things in life and not 842 of them. It’s making me really think about what I want to spend my time on and where it should be. TV has become a luxury at times.

I look at my son and he has no idea he spent his summer playing at a water table we found on the side of the road and going to the same park repeatedly. He’s happy he has a new sister and his family eats dinner together every night, even if we ate pasta salad entirely ten too many times.

I look at my husband. He knows what I have learned. His summer was not what he hoped either. He made it on maybe five motorcycle rides this summer, a number entirely too low for him. He is the most laid back, kind man I know though and I am grateful our children have his attitude and character to look up to.

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And I look at my daughter amd I think, “You did this.” She slowed us down. Her presence made us rethink our commitments and hammer down where we are meant to focus our talents. She is teaching us to rest. Even if I am kicking and screaming.

xo, bethany rose

Apple Picking 2017

~All PinkBlush product was given in exchange for my honest review.~

I don’t know what better way to bring in October than with apple picking! Our friends came into town this weekend and we headed out to get our daily fall dose of apples and pictures.

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We did this last year with the same friends and I love the idea of starting traditions with friends. Our kids all had so much fun together. It was even more fun this year with Emmett because he could walk and even “kind of” climb the ladder. If you remember, last fall he was still working through physical therapy and had only been walking for about a month before we went.

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We go to the same orchard every year and have been since we moved here. They spray their apples with organic pesticides and I am pretty sure the owners are Christian. It is actually in his backyard which is pretty cool! I think the place is growing in popularity though which makes me happy for the owners but a little sad for us.

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So what does one wear to the apple orchard? Well I know the plaid and the puffy vests are totally in and I love that look, but I opted for cozy and chill instead. I am pretty sure that’s where I stand with most clothes though >.< I love my new shirt from PinkBlush and picked it out specifically for this fall. It’s extremely comfortable and is a great shirt for hanging out around the house or doing fun day trips with my family!

xo, bethany rose