Part 2: Twelve Secrets to a Lasting Marriage

It is my privilege to share with you my grandmother’s remaining six secrets to a lasting and love filled marriage. She and my grandfather weathered the storms together and were happily married for 62 years. If you missed the first six secrets, be sure to check them out to have all 12 secrets to a successful marriage!

twelve secrets to a lasting and successful marriage from a woman married 62 years

7. Say “please.” Prefix requests (big and little) with the word “please.”

8. Realize the importance of daily quality time together. My grandmother will be the first to admit that times have changed since she said “I do.” In our present society women work much more than they did in 1955. She says that every night she would try to give my grandfather quality time. She would socialize and talk on the phone during the day, but when my grandfather got home, it was their time together. Her aim with this last point is to stress the importance of spending time together.

 9.  Pray together daily.  My grandparents prayed together about 5 mornings a week right after breakfast. My grandfather would read a devotional and scripture and they both would pray.  She says they would hold hands during this time and I think that is the sweetest picture!

 10. Surprise one another with acts of love.  Whether it be small or large, express your affection though unexpected acts of love. They can be verbal or physical, just something your spouse is not expecting! This brings joy to the giver and receiver. My grandmother recounts that my grandfather loved coconut (and she couldn’t stand it). She would often buy him coconut treats when she saw them in the store.
11.Don’t bring up past resolved issues. Yes, you read that correctly. If any past issue has been resolved and had closure, don’t bring it up again (unless unusual circumstances make it essential). Doing this can bring up old hurt, anger and even create new problems.
12. Make God the center. If you know my grandparents, you are probably wondering why this is last. Well, it is honestly the most important and I wanted to leave this as the final thought as you walk away and take this wisdom with you. Making God the center and the foundation of a marriage is the key. You can do numbers 1-11 but without number 12, you are missing out.
I hope these words stick with you. Let’s be a a generation of husbands and wives fighting for our marriages and changing the statistics of divorce in this nation.
What is a marriage secret that has been passed on to you?
twelve secrets to a lasting marriage


  1. livewellplaytogether

    March 2, 2018 at 10:23 am

    Such great tips!! I can’t even pick a favorite because I found myself nodding “yes!” to each one! What a great blessing to have grandparents that can share such wisdom!

    1. waves + lilacs

      March 6, 2018 at 8:46 pm

      It is truly a blessing and a legacy they leave!!
      <3, Bethany

  2. kbraswell1187

    March 5, 2018 at 2:54 pm

    I love this!! Make God the center is the most important! When both are seeking the Lord, all else falls in line! <3 Such great advice!

    1. waves + lilacs

      March 6, 2018 at 8:45 pm

      Absolutely! Such wisdom from her.

      <3, Bethany

  3. Brittney M Hjelseth

    March 5, 2018 at 5:05 pm

    #10 is hardest for me. I think we so easily get into our routine and thinking up ‘ideas’ doesn’t come natural. but love all your ideas and how true they all are!

    1. waves + lilacs

      March 6, 2018 at 8:44 pm

      I have definitely found myself going through the list and thinking, “I could work on that!”

      <3, Bethany

  4. sgmart187

    March 6, 2018 at 10:05 am

    These are great! And so true!

    1. waves + lilacs

      March 6, 2018 at 8:44 pm

      She is a wise lady!

      <3, Bethany

  5. sunshineandmunchkins

    March 6, 2018 at 3:59 pm

    I love hearing marriage “secrets” from couples who have been together for a long time! I think one of the best pieces of advice we were given is that sometimes you just need to sleep on it when you have problems because 1/2 the time, you’ll wake up and either come up with a solution or realize it wasn’t that big of a deal in the first place.

    1. waves + lilacs

      March 6, 2018 at 8:43 pm

      That is great advice!

      <3, Bethany

  6. Carole Schmidt

    March 8, 2018 at 9:59 pm

    I love you, Bethany Rose. And Grandpa loved you sooooo much. You were such a blessing to him!

  7. Sunshine Blogger Award – Waves + Lilacs

    March 21, 2018 at 3:25 pm

    […] written so far? I am so proud of my two part mini series where I interviewed my grandmother on her 62 years of marriage and why it was SO successful. It was a super inspirational post for me and encouraging as I look at […]

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